There was a time when all I wanted was to work and make money. I would lie awake at night thinking of different side jobs I could get, what I could sell, or whose kids I could babysit.
For the last 2 years of University, I slept in my car between the end of my night shift job at 6 a.m. and the start of my early morning Ag Nutrition class at 8:50 a.m. (Life Hack: crack a window!)
That time was life changing. It showed me what I was willing to do to have the life I wanted and I’m really proud of what I accomplished, even though it left some pretty deep mental scars on me for years after.
I did what I set out to do. I sawed and I saved and I travelled! I had enough money to go travel South America for six months and then make my way to Germany, where my life changed forever.
All the sleepless nights and crying in the bathroom at 4 a.m. paid off!
But, there is always a but.. that time has been put behind me (for now).
I’m more particular now about where and how I spend my time. I used to give it out willy-nilly to the highest bidder, but I don’t care about the bidding war anymore. My time is mine.
I’ve never turned down extra hours. Overtime was my mistress and I treated her well. But, here we are in a time where I went to my employer and stated clearly that I am no longer willing to work more than eight hours per day, no more than forty hours per week and no more than five days in a row.
Old Lindsay would have dropped dead in her tracks.
But what about the overtime? What if they fore you because you’re not “dedicated” enough? – My brain
I don’t care anymore. My life is more important than what I can provide for another person.
I’ve never had time for hobbies, building friendships, or just sitting in the park listening to the birds.
Since setting my boundaries at work, I’ve become a new person. Matt immediately noticed my mood improved and that I actually had energy when I got home (which never happens).
Sure, I might lose my job, because there is always another person out there ready to prove they can work the most for the least, but I don’t care. That will be their problem.
I hate being unemployed and will probably wrestle mentally with that fact when (or if) it comes to pass, but I’ll look back and read this to remind myself that this is necessary and also temporary. That’s the beauty of seasons.
I’m ready to enjoy life with Matt, to have time to plan our dates, our finances and our future. I’m ready to see friends and (maybe) make some new ones. I’m ready to lay in the grass and not think about the money I could be making if I just picked up a new gig.
The season of working so hard to avoid avtually getting my life together is over. Now is the season of contemplation.
Who am I? What do I want to do with my life? What kind of life do I want for myself and my partner?
These are the questions I will be contemplating until the next season blows though. I dare say, I’m a little excited about it.
What has been your favourite season in life so far? Mine was definitely my travel and falling in love season, especially because they faded so well into each other 🙂
Thanks for reading. Hopefully this has helped you during your changing seasons as well.